Wednesday, June 8, 2011

For the love of love

My life has been consumed with weddings lately. It seems that every where I turn someone else is engaged, their wedding is this week or they are on their honeymoon. I'm super excited for all of these people, most of them are my closest friends...but I can't help but be disappointed in myself at the same time. All of this is just everything that I had planned for my own life by this time. Its really hard for me to realize that I'm almost twenety five and have 2 year plan or really any plan at all when it comes to knowing when or if I will ever get married. I don't know if its jealousy or stress or just wishing that I had someone to go to sleep with every night and wake up to every morning and spend all of my time with and thinking about.
Times like this are when I'm glad that I have God and a hope. I know that His plan is better then mine. And maybe I am doing something wrong as to where God doesn't want to bless me with the desires of my heart.
So that leaves me now to try and figure out what to do now. Should I keep my 2 year plan or give it up and just roll with whatever. I hate being out of control but maybe that is what I'm supposed to be learning right now...
we will see
-C

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