lonnnggg time

Whoa, so much has happend since the last time I wrote. You think that you have everything figured out then it all falls apart again and you're right back to where we started.

Once again, it has to do mostly with a guy. I met someone new. And of course he seemed like the perfect little prince charming. But of course, all good things will definately come to an end. He seemed so amazing. And everything was wonderful, soooo we hung out, alot and then he asked if I wanted to be his girlfriend. Then he put it on facebook, it takes me four days to accept the facebook request. So that lasts about a week, then i asked him how things were because he seemed so weird, and he was like, no acutally I don't think that I want this. Soooo that didn't last long. And once again, I'm stuck wondering what in the world did I do. Then of course facebook is the devil. I get on there like every 5 seconds to see what he is doing and all those other stupid girls that he is talking to. Totally not healthy but what can you do.

So back to square one and where to go from here. i have a great job, and I'm back in school for hair. Which I absolutely LOVE! my job right now i'm only getting to stay at the front desk, but its still the atmosphere and thats pretty great. And I have the most amazing friends in the world. Heather is always there for me, and we are about to go to the beach for a few days, just the girlfriends. So that will be so fun. But I am still just wondering what in the world I am going to do. What is it that I keep doing wrong. I just dont get it. I didn't call him all the time, I didn't try and make him do all kinds of crazy things or try and make him hang out with me all the time, and still...I wasn't what he wanted.

When am I gonna get to be what someone wants?